A video by a Cuban psychologist discussing the "role reversal" within families on the island has sparked a widespread debate on social media. It has garnered hundreds of comments from those who see supporting parents as a moral duty and others who argue that this burden, created by a failed system, should not be glorified.
Psychologist Gise Ponce, through her account @guapaspordentro_psicologia, shared a reel addressing a phenomenon she observes frequently in Cuba: children who grow up to become the financial providers for their parents, especially after emigrating.
"Many children don't leave feeling completely free; they emigrate with an entire family on their shoulders," Ponce explains in the video.
She differentiates between filial love and structural obligation: "In a fair world, parents should somehow ensure their own old age. Children shouldn't have to indefinitely sacrifice their own path or process to secure their parents' well-being."
Ponce also highlights a paradox many recognize: "Sometimes, the child who seems the most independent is actually carrying the heaviest load."
The Emotional Divide
Comments on the video reveal a profound emotional fracture. One follower shared her harsh reality: "I'm all alone in this country, and I'm responsible for six people. I've never had a vacation, been a citizen for years. What's left over goes to medicine, food, Cuba-related expenses. And the worst part, may God forgive me, is that sometimes it overwhelms me."
Others argue that the issue isn't love but the normalization of an injustice: "Helping out of love is one thing and part of family solidarity; making that help the sole guarantee of our parents' survival is entirely different."
Psychological and Systemic Factors
Some commenters point to a self-perpetuating pattern: "There is a strong psychological factor instilled in us from a young age, making us feel guilty for every enjoyment and advancement." Others describe situations where parents stop pursuing professional growth, relying on children abroad: "No need, I have a child abroad."
This phenomenon creates a cycle of guilt, exhaustion, and fleeting satisfaction among Cuban immigrants, which many describe as inevitable yet unsustainable in the long run.
Systemic Failures and Generational Burdens
Critical voices in the comments directly blame the regime: "The fault lies with a failed and unjust system like Cuba's." Another summed up what many aspire to: "Love is inherited; forced dependency should not be passed down from generation to generation."
The Impact of Emigration on Cuban Families
What is the role reversal phenomenon in Cuban families?
The role reversal phenomenon refers to children becoming the financial providers for their parents, especially after emigrating from Cuba.
How does the Cuban regime contribute to this burden?
The Cuban regime is criticized for creating a failed and unjust system that forces children to support their parents, placing an undue burden on emigrants.
Why do some children feel guilty about their success?
A strong psychological factor instilled from a young age makes many feel guilty for enjoying life and advancing, due to a sense of obligation to support their family back home.